Butterfly's Birthday

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Saturday, 28 January 2012

12 Months, 12 Challenges - February AND night time potty trained?

So for January I had two challenges - one for me (not eating chocolate) which went pretty well! (I was mostly very good about my challenge) and one for Butterfly, which.... well... started of good but then went very bad. I think it was the first day that I tried forcing brushing her teeth and then I decided I really rather not do it that way. Because I don't want it to be something she hates and something we have wars over, and anyway I doubt that I was doing a good job when forcing. The first few days went pretty well, but then it went bad. Right now not much is done. Not sure if I mentioned, but at least she doesn't really eat sweet, so at least that. I will put this challenge on hold, and return to it in a month or two (which doesn't mean we won't be trying again unchallenged :-) ).

Night time potty training. Night time my girl needs to pee sometimes (rather, rarely) at about nineish, and then around midnight-one am and that's it for the night until we wake up (and even then, she would nurse in bed for 1/2 an hour to an hour, dry of course). Of course there are days when things happen differently (I am sure tonight will be one of those nights), but generally that's how it is lately. And if you followed me long enough, you know she sleeps without a nappy (EC) and peeing means me holding her over a bowel. She, on her part, wakes up to pee, or half wakes up - I do not take a sleeping baby, but a baby that has cued me that she needs to go.
Anyway, why am I telling you all this? Well there was a discussion on my SMC board about night time toilet training, started of by a mother seeking advice. As we (me and Butterfly, that is) are not the norm, I do not participate in such discussions. But then they were talking about toilet training and maturity and how you have to be mature blah blah in order to be toilet trained at night, as opposed to day time toilet training. I chimed in with how it's with us, and well besides a nasty remark [somehow if you do EC and/or don't vaccinate your child and/or homeschool etc etc people feel free to be mean and nasty] I was told that my girl is not night time potty trained. In my original comment, I did say that Butterfly is not fully potty trained at night, but that comment I got made me think.
What does it mean to be night time potty trained? Not peeing in ones sleep? Butterfly has never-ever peed in her sleep. She has been sleeping without a nappy from when she was 2 months old and she has never learnt to just let go of her pee. She always wakes up or even half wakes to pee, wiggling and moving uncomfortably. Not always I get it and put her over the potty (and yes, we had some pretty bad months), but it is always me who misses, not her! Not peeing at all during the night? Okay, then that means I am not night time toilet trained because I do go to the toilet at night. Nowadays with baby and all not so much, but I always used to go at least once to the bathroom at night. So if I, an adult, go to the toilet at night, is it reasonable to expect a child not to go at all during the night? [though I don't think going in the night to pee was a habit of mine during childhood. I wonder when I picked it up..] And she does go for seven or eight hours without needing to pee! Not needing the help of an adult to pee? Then yes, she is not night time toilet trained, because she will not go by herself. So while she probably is not yet really potty trained at night, she is really not far from it. I do believe that once she masters daytime potty training (and lately she seems to be doing so much better!) and knows to how to go by herself, pulling down trousers and all that she'll master that last point of night time potty training :-).

And now for February's challenge. I want to try both [but not at the same time] not eating dairy - though that will be too difficult for me! so maybe going off cow's milk (but yes goat/sheep milk). I also want to try and minimize eating wheat products. Neither of which I feel ready to face right now, so I will (hopefully) leave these challenges for another month.
I think my challenge for the month should be getting my house clean every day (night) on a regular base. I am such a messy person and the nanny very much helps me keep things tidy, but amazingly it gets so messy so quickly. So I would like to try and keep it nice and clean, not let it get into such a bad state.
Challenge number two would be to spend more time with Butterfly actually playing with her! I do a lot of taking care of her and her needs and we usually take a lengthy walk before nap time (going nowhere in particular, like yesterday was more or less just up and down the street with her little wagon, as much as I can, I like to let her dictate where we're going :-)) But I don't so much just sit and play with her. Yes, she plays very nicely on her own and I take advantage of that and do my stuff. But I want to be with her! I don't want to look back and feel sorry for all those times we didn't enjoy together. So I really want to try and do better..

Wednesday, 11 January 2012

and cows go moo

Butterfly had her 18 month check up today (and a shot), and the nurse, well she annoyed me! [though not as much as when Butterfly went in last time. I think big difference is that she is much much much more bubbling now and she does have a word or two]. So nurse goes on about how it's important to expose Butterfly to children and children's songs for her to develop language, talking about the rhythm and the repetitiveness. And well I'm not saying no to that, though I don't think it's a must! But then [Butterfly now sitting at a table looking at a book with animals] she [nurse] goes on to how I should show Butterfly pictures of animals in these hard baby proof books and how I should make the animal sounds so she'll learn. When I was reluctant, she said I could take her to a nearby farm for her to see hens and cows herself. Well yes, that would be much better. But still not very real. And I ask - why? why is it important that little kids know that that animal is called a cow and that she goes moo? I am sure she will not go through life not knowing what a cow is, so why is it important to push this word onto them? I mean if we were living in a farm or overwise seeing cows daily, then yes, that would be one word I think my girl should know.
Same with body parts. Why is it important to teach them head and eyes and ears? Why can't we leave them to learn these words by themselves? I mean we do not teach them eyebrows or cheeks or kidney or heel, and yet they do acquire these words later on in life. Because at this early age I very much believe in real, authentic "teaching". Everytime Butterfly wants to hold my cellphone, I tell her to put it (the lace onto which it's tied..) around her neck. She might not exactly know what a neck is, but she has an idea. This is real. I do not point at my/her/a doll's neck and say repeatedly neck [which my mum sometimes does with words like nose, and drives me crazy].
And you know, we go for a walk every (or almost every) morning. And while I don't so much, but showing her the different plants, maybe naming them (which means I need to know the names..), that would be much more real. These plants we pass by are part of her life, she sees them, sometimes picks their leaves or tries to pull a branch etc. A cow is not part of her life, not her world. Teaching her that a cow goes moo, in my eyes is nothing more than taming her. Showing her this plant or that plant on our path, I believe is expanding her world.

98th percentile for height! (95 head and I think it was 87 for weight). I know she is tall for her age, but oh my, she is almost off the chart!! [and don't ask me how that's possible as I am not tall and I don't think donor was too tall..]

And now to the Proud Mummy section..
I haven't much talk about how our toilet training/EC is going, mainly because there is nothing interesting happening :-). Around her birthday I was very eager to start toilet training (after we've been doing Elimination Communication almost since birth but haven't been too successful with it). Well we started of [off?] nicely but then, well it just went back to nothing. But I did (DO) still dress her without a nappy (unless we go to a doctors appointment etc. and of course she wears a nappy with the nanny) because when while I haven't succeeded in toilet training her, I do believe in not peeing/pooing on oneself! And I will add that she is - a. most certainly aware of her pee/poo and where you should do it; b. she CAN hold herself. Anyway, with the poo lately it's going well. If I see she is about to go [or if there is a smell of poo - one of the signs she is about to go, is the smell, yes before she does..], I will sit her on the potty (and bring madam her bottle of water..) and she'll be okay.
Then about a week ago, I wasn't feeling good so I lay down in bed and let her play. Will add that she was bottomless. Anyway at one point she comes into the room with the potty in her hand, and yes she has done a number two! Mummy was so proud!!
And today.. I wasn't in the room with her, and then I see her trying to take off her trousers. Now she does that a lot, trying to put on and off clothes, but somehow I could see that this was for real, so I took them off for her [I usually try not to help her, I hope to write about that in another post] and put her on the potty. And oh yes did she deliver! I was so so proud of her!
Of course writing this is going to jinx it, but I think I can say that as for #2 my girl is toilet trained. Now lets master peeing in potty!