The meaning of life

yep, that big question..

I believe in the before and after life. That there is this higher form of life where our souls live, but for some reason (a lesson we want to learn), we materialize as humans (or ants or zebras or grass or trees..). In that after/before life place, we "decide" how/why/who we will connect on this life, like friends, a teacher and a pupil, friends, etc. Throughout my pregnancy, I completely had this sensation that Butterfly is a very old soul, not a newbie. I remember feeling how weird as obviously this is a baby and I should feel like she is new into the world. Now of course it could be my beliefs that made me feel that way, I don't know. I just know that that's how I felt. And I do believe that she is here to teach me a lesson and to learn one herself (as any other person).

On a side note, not sure yet how or if relevant but feel like I should mention.. ever since her birth, I feel much much older than just before, and I am very scared of dying. It's going to happen! I will die one day. And oh my! I just hope my little girl won't be so little.
And there was this programme I saw once ( I believe a BBC production) where they showed that all these near death experiences that we hear of, where people nearly die but haven't and came back to tell about it, with meeting with those who have already passed and the purple tunnel and the bright light and all, all those had some kind of scientific explanation. And I took that quite hard. [but now writing, they only proved that there may be scientific proof to the above phenomena, still doesn't mean that near death experiences aren't real..].

So, the other day I read this article. It talked about the big bang and the end of the universe, blah blah. And then it talked about how when the universe will end, it will end. There will be no other big bang to restart the stars and all. Just a big nothing (and even the black holes will die out). Now I thought the theory was that the universe is expanding and then will collapse and then expand again, etc. Or that if it will one day die, then there will be again a big bang etc. Not that the universe will one day die and that will be it.
And yes, that will happen so far into the future, that planet Earth will probably not even be a memory, and nobody will know there ever was a Billy and a Butterfly. But if the universe is to die one day, then all my nice belief about the life before and after death, well not really possible. So if so, if we are not put here to learn a lesson, what is the meaning of life?? Is life really just a coincidence where the right organs and chemicals and all met? Are we just randomness or is there something more than that to life?
Yeah, the big question. That's what's on my mind these days. So on to you, my one and a half reader - What is your intake on the meaning of life, or do you think there's no meaning?
(P.S - scheduling this to be published sometime in the near future)