Sunday, 11 May 2008

Second attempt

Between independence day and the gynecologists' conference, I had just one day to succeed. In my mind I "knew" that the second attempt will be a failure and was willing to skip and go straight into the third one. But, well... hmmm... I obviously can't go from first to third without having a second in the middle. So here was my ideal second attempt failure - with only one day to attempt insemination I can't possibly feel upset if I don't end up pregnant.
So I went today with my bag prepared with everything - documents (for fertility clinic & sperm bank), thermos, something to read while waiting. Somehow the thermos part didn't really seem right, something about it felt wrong, but hey, if they tell me in the clinic to go fetch the sperm, I rather go immediately and not make a big detour through home. Well, I do have intuitions and even good ones. If I feel that the thermos would be unnecessary, then so it will. And was. It seems that I've already ovulated, so it's kind of too late. Means I miss this month's attempt and have to wait another month to try again. It is so frustrating to fail without even trying. On the bright side I can say that at least I passed the "must fail" second attempt!

9 comments:

Michal said...

Is there any change of plan, now that they know you may ovulate early? Will they invite you earlier than in 4 weeks? Are you measuring your temperature every morning and drawing a chart to find when ovulation is (or using any other more modern way to find out)?

Note that 4 weeks from today is Shavuot eve - so you'll have Friday-Saturday-ErevHag-Hag, four days in a row. See if you can schedule to 4+5 of June.

Good Luck!

Michal said...

Oh... and at first read I thought the thermos was so you can have coffee while you wait :-D.
Didn't see a blanket in the list... Make sure you are comfortable, so you can allow the swimmers to have their race without gravity interfering...

Billy said...

Didn't think about Shabuot. Damn! It probably will fall around that time :-)
Every month I meet with a doctor to set a new protocol. Basically I begin tracking ovulation at day 10. The problem this month was with Yom Ha'atzmaut so I only came on day 13. Last month day 13 was excellent.
Hope Shavuot won't be such a big holiday - they do work Fridays, so I hope/assume they would work also Erev Hag. Maybe I should start getting stressed out & have my perioud delayed by a few days :-/


And no, not a blanket, but a long T-shirt! It felt much better during the US, hopefully also for inseminations!

P.S
don't really like coffee.. (I'm a tea person)

Billy said...
This comment has been removed by the author.
Billy said...

:-) should have been :-(

Michal said...

long T-shirt... hm...
How does it wrap around you? do you lay on top of it?
(there's a risk of a spill-out in this case, unlike in US... you don't want a wet stain on your behind... - sorry for the unpleasant description...).
I'd take a thin bed-sheet with you (even a small one...) :-).

(did you delete a spam comment, or an error?).

Billy said...

:-]Well I haven't really tried it so I don't yet know if it'll work (bringing a sheet is too embaracing). I think that since I know the door is locked (I locked it myself - the doctor & nurse went out through a side door, they shouln't come back, but if they do, they've already seen me..) and the no-one can or will come in accidently. So knowing, I know. It's just feeling a bit exposed. So I gather - if I don't see my private parts, I will feel much better about it, therfore the long shirt. Stupid, I know, and still have to see if works. (for the U.S it was just a bit nicer walking the three steps to the bed).

The comment deleted was my own (annoying that they have that message!).

Seed Monkey said...

Personally, I didn't care about having my private parts fiddled with during the exams that I had to take to be a donor, then again it was all external .... but then again, for different reasons a few years back I had an internal exam and still didn't care.

They are medical professionals, and have seen bigger/smaller uglier/prettier and to be honest if that is their living then they have signed up to see this stuff.

I don't care as long as they do their job correctly.

I am sorry that this time stuff went wonky for you as I was hoping for the best. I am sure that what you deserve and wish for will come when he/she is ready :)

Billy said...

Hi Seed
It's not so much the embarassment of the doctors/nursers seeing (although I won't say I am not emarassed. I do understand it's necessary and that they've seen lots of those body parts before, but still...), It's more the lying there for such and such length of time exposed (yes, I know it's very stupid since the door is locked).

And thanks :-)