Not sure exactly where I'll have treatments, but that's a long and bureaucratic story, so I won't go into it here.. Only that I think I'd like to start with a few unmedicated inseminations as I don't want to stop breastfeeding. If that doesn't work then perhaps a natural IVF cycle which regardless I've heard is better at my age as my eggs now are amongst the last so my body is sending out the best..
And then there is the wanding, and doing (hopefully!) unmedicated cycles also means more monitoring and there's a little girl to think about. Do I take her with me? Do I find someone to look after her while I go? Well, I have three options- 1. my mum (with perhaps my sister helping for the first hour); 2. the nanny (assuming they can); 3. taking her with me.
Advantages / Disadvateges
* Mum
main advantage - not having to take daughter with me and well, not paying some one to look after my daughter.
disadvantages- it is early morning and my mum is not an early bird (hence why sister, but she can only until they go to school/work). My mum helps me quite a lot, or at least she feels she's doing a lot for me, so this is another burden I'm imposing on her. And last but not least, she will know when I have treatments, and will constantly ask if there are any results etc. I really don't need her on my back..
* nanny
first, it's a big assumption that she can and will..
advatnages - I'm not asking for favours from my mum.
disadvantages - more money to pay her when I really don't have that extra (and mind, these are hours paid where I won't be working and earning) and like I said for my mother, she will know when I'm trying, not too happy about that!
I think the nanny option is more on paper as it is the one I least like.
* taking her with me
main advantage - no one has to know anything until I tell my news!
disadvantages - it is a fertility clinic. most of the women do not have kids. I do remember how it felt when babies or toddlers were brought in. I did understand that sometimes you have no choice, but nevertheless it did hurt. Besides that, wherever I end up being treated, it is quite shlep. One thing going by myself, but with a little toddler? And add to that that way before she normally wakes up (yes, we are late sleepers..) so very unpleasant bus rides (yes that was plural. I would need two buses each way). And I think another big disadvantage is not wanting my daughter to see me being wanded. Just doesn't sound right for me (and no, I will not have her wait outside while I'm inside..).
I think this is leaning towards my mother helping me out. I am really not too happy about that, but it seems like the best option.
4 comments:
It looks like you Mom is the best choice...if it weren't for the extra cost, the Nanny would have been a good option since really, you wouldn't have to tell her where you're going.
I'm excited for you to be T42
I'm in a similar situation to you. I go to my clinic on Friday to start my meds to induce a period. Friday is Good Friday - everything is closed except fertility clinics :) I made a later appointment so instead of taking Scarlett with me, I'm going to leave her with my mom.
My issue is that on work days when I need to go for monitoring, I hate to wake Scarlett up EARLY - I would have to get her to daycare when the doors open at 7, which means waking her around 6:30. This means that I will be waking her an hour early and completely throwing off her day at school - this makes me nervous. My hope is that I can manage to do monitoring on the weekends...lol, wishful thinking!
Good luck in T42.
It's so much different, TTC when you already have one, isn't it?
Yeah, I think your mom is the best option...even if it means having to deal with her asking for news when you don't want to talk about it!
I find it so difficult to juggle ARTreatments and having a toddler... I take her with me sometimes, but that makes it tricky in the appt. I hope you find the best solution for you xoxo
PS. I've gone public again... so hopefully will be easier xo
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