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First I would like to apologize for being so late on my reading. Currently my reader is saying 478 yikes! unread posts :-(. It was this translation job that got me so behind, and then when I can I come and see such numbers and get overwhelmed.... [I can't just erase all and start new, just can't do that, but I will admit that I've learned that it's okay to not read every single post..]. And this translation job, it was hard work but good money (though when I thought about it, with the hard work I put into it, it wasn't so much good pay per hour, but more the fact that I could do it when Butterfly is sleeping [hmmm.. I mean when she's finally sleeping..] and not need to pay a nanny to have Butterfly off me so I can work) but the sad thing is she (the one who I "work" for) is on a break now. I can totally understand her - it is the summer holiday, she is home with the kids, it's hard enough for her she just can't take this extra work [she does this as something extra, it is not her main work]. Oh and did I mention that she's an SMC too? And with TRIPLETS? Yeah, I can understand her not wanting extra work when she has the kids full time, but it does suck a little as it was a good extra income in a difficult financial time. And then there's the FB group I've become addicted too (but I think it's starting to wear off. lol) and of course tonight I'm writing this post so won't be reading any (sorry!!).

Anyway.. that was a long introduction to what I hope will be a sort(ish?) post with an update on things. I wanted this time to do things through the public system. Mainly because of the cost but also it is easier for me to get to the local hospital (where I bought my sperm). But they have all the time in the world (I don't). I believe I wrote about the previous visit. Well at least they were nice. I came back to a really horrid doctor. Two things they wanted were from and endocrinologist to say I'm balanced and a diagnostic hysteroscopy. Well as for the later, I made a mistake and had an HSG. Okay wrong test, but really is that a reason to delay?? And the endo. I gave the dr. a letter saying I am being monitored. I understand my TSH is too high and I don't expect to start treatment, but knowing I am being monitored can't we just put a treatment plan which I will start only when I'm balanced? I mean do I really need to come in again!?! But more than that, he was really horrible and rude to me. 

So I decided that I really do not have time to waste and went to this semi private hospital. Actually it's the same one where I had B done, but now they added a co-pay (or whatever it's called) which is per treatment (I thought it was a once only thing). Sucks but I think it's much better that the public hospital (oh, did I mention how hard it was getting them on the phone when I needed? So I've been this week to them. Avery nice doctor [I could go all private and choose what doctor to work with or I could do what I'm doing and be with whatever doctor who are all top doctors. This first appointment I scheduled to when this doctor who was highly recommend works]. What a difference! As for the hysterscopy, he explained that it's a better test and because I gave birth but didn't make a deal of it. And as for the TSH, only when I'm balanced we will start treatment (as I said, didn't expect otherwise) but we still built a plan. (shortish post!? I must be kidding!). I am now on CD1. In about a week I'll test my TSH levels. If we are a go (please please please, but probably too early) then I'll be cycling. If not, then next month might be a problem as they are on vacation on the week of succot (I think end of Sep.) but hopefully my cycle will correlate otherwise it might be only Oct when I can actually finally start cycling.

I have one frozen embie there so we'll start off with a FET. On one hand it will be totally weird if I do get pregnant with this embie as it is from the cycle previous to the one from which I have Butterfly. So who is the older child!? I am also quite pessimistic it will work because after all the best embryos which were transferred in that cycle did not succeed so why it? On the other hand I can't leave this potential life of mine hanging there for ever. And what if there is a child in it?

The good news about it being a FET is that it's a natural cycle ( I will only be getting a progesterone support) so I'll be okay with breastfeeding. Which by the way I was to tell or not to tell and decided not. I won't lie if asked, but I am not going to have things put off yet again when I've researched and believe that at her age I can still breastfeed.

Okay it's after 2 am. I think I'll join my daughter in slumberland. I hope (I think) I wrote it all. Goodnight!

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