My Pathway to Motherhood

We are three and a quarter. When does it get better???

As evident from previous post, Butterfly goes to sleep late. Very late. A cycle I don't seem able to stop. I know there are other factors like the fact that we are very much out of routine or that I am feeling very anxious as I don't yet know how and what with my studies. And yes, she is in a difficult age. Take for example today, we were on our way home when she said she wanted to eat. I said okay, when we get home. But she carried on whining about wanting to eat. I do know and understand that kid's logic is not the same as adults and while I understand that if there is no food on us, the best thing is to get home as quick as possible and no point to whine about it. She obviously doesn't yet get that, so she goes on and on. Grrrr. We then passed a small playground. She wanted to go and play. I didn't mind stopping at the playground (but didn't have too much time to spare), so I let her play (of course she forgot she was hungry..). I then decided we had to go. And boy did she cry and whine, riding her balance bike crying how she doesn't want to go home. And I just couldn't stand it anymore. I am so fed up with this whining of hers, I n ever thought it would get up my nerves as it does.  So I snapped at her to stop it, and talked angrily to her and shouted at her, but of course all that didn't help, so I just put my hands on my ears as I really couldn't take it any longer. Next she was asking for a hug and stopped her whining. Not proud of my self, and do not want to use this as a method to quite her, but at least for the moment it worked..
Later she whined because she wanted me to ride my bike with her on the pavement and then because we forgot her bottle and she can't drink from the drinking fountain and then on and on because this or that. And I know it a snowball as I am cross and angry at her which not only does not help, it even makes matters worse and then she goes to sleep late and a new horrible day begins.

On the bright side I want to tell you about the other day. I did something, not sure if it was the right thing to do - I forcefully took something away from her. I do not like to use force on her, as it is not fair as I am the stronger one being the adult. Anyway I digress as this is not the point. The point is that she got angry with me and, as my sister who witnessed told me later, Butterfly was kicking the sofa while hugging me (I had a vague notion about the kicking of the sofa..). My sister was amazed as she said her kids would either try and hit her or want to get away from her. My daughter hugs me. I do love that she feels the need to hug me when I'm cross with her and I don't want her to stop that habit, so I always return that hug, but can be rather difficult when you have angry feelings...

Another kind of funny thing - she has picked up these annoying habits like being often tired of walking/riding when we go places, telling me it is very far away. This is not the funny part, it is annoying! Before her cousins came with us in the summer holiday on the bus and the walk to the bus, complaining about how long it takes, Butterfly was fine with the walk and with the bus drive. Anyway today  these cousins were fighting and telling each other I hate you, and their mother was complaining that this is something new they had learnt from their other cousins (from their father's side) with whom they spent the summer. It was kind of funny as probably the mother of those kids is complaining about X Y and Z who have spoiled her kids as the have never before ......  and so on and so on. My daughter has probably spoiled it (or will) for another mother..

Oh well, three more months to go! [I have no idea if this gets better at three and a half, but I am going to tell myself that it will!!]