A bit annoyed. Mainly at myself. Starting to gain some understanding, and looking at the figures (lining; follicle; progesterone; E2 [unfortunately this clinic does not check LH levels] I realize that I might have been doing the inseminations a tee bit early, or at least I should have come again two days later to check the figures again and perhaps do another insemination.
When I first started and told the main nurse I would also like to know the blood test results, her reply was - why? and implied that those figures are not for laymen people like me. They know their stuff and will do the insemination at the right time. All I have to do is trust them that I am in the best of hands. Well it is a very good fertility clinic with the top doctors working there (except that it's the head nurse who makes the call as to when to inseminate), but as I answered her, I still want to know by myself how my body works. Unfortunately they do not post results on the web or volunteer it when phoning, and usually I forget to ask. So I try and ask them to photocopy my follow up sheet. Recently I got the last two (the first I got a while back), and am quite annoyed by the numbers. Feels a lot like my first driving test where I really drove great, except I passed through a green flikering light [probably my fault, but I was very much suprised to learn that not all green is green...]. Later on, on other driving tests I had, I drove terribly, but that first test, like my first and third inseminations (on the second one the numbers were all terrible, even the numbers related to the sperm), these were very close calls. If only I stopped at those lights, if only I came again two days later for another insemination.
Well anyway I am gaining knowledge. On numbers related to what the clinic checks, as on BBT (i.e my morning tempreture), CM (my cervial fluids) etc. I'm happy I now know a bit more and will have more to say as to when to have the inseminations.